You're such a girl

"You're such a girl" he said
And my eyes did a roll
An involuntary movement
I couldn't control

I know he's just teasing
But what does he mean?
Am I an infant?
A child or a teen?

If he means I am female
Well yes I have breasts
Not very large ones
But there none the less

I have a womb
And two ovaries
My hips can bear children
With remarkable ease

But he doesn't mean that
He just wants to say
That my purchase of shoes
Is a female cliché

But is it that girly?
To buy new footwear?
Kind of essential
To walk anywhere.

Who gets to decide
Who's a girl and who's not?
And if I am girly
Should I care a jot?

Well no, but I do
'Cause I don't think I am
It implies I am frivolous
Vapid, a sham

That the word 'girl'

Should evoke such concepts

Is a feminist bugbear

But still I object

OK, I like ballet

And yes I wear tights

I blow dry my hair
And I have had highlights

But I do not like Strictly
I do not read Heat
I do not bake cupcakes
I do not use Veet

I multitask like a loser

My nails look like crap
I think pink is horrendous
And I'm great with a map...

This is the point though

All these things are banal

They do not define me

Or my gender at all

So don't tell me I'm girly
It's bound to annoy
And I'll just reply

"God, you're such a boy."